Create a new thread

List of Categories

Welcome to our Support Forum

anger issues

General

Ask the Therapist
Apr 30 2012, 15:08
  • lanie Newbie

    -1 +1

    I have a hard time controlling my anger and I don't know how to heal..
  • jaelle Contributor

    -1 +1

    Apr 30 2012, 22:36
    Do you know what is causing your anger? Does your anger flare up when you are frustrated? These are important questions to ask yourself if you want to start on the path to healing. Talking about what angers you and what frustrates you and getting suggestions on healthy outlets for these feelings is very helpful, and I am sure lots of us here can offer that support.
    • lanie Newbie

      -1 +1

      May 3 2012, 14:59
      Well since I was little ive always had a temper and yes it flares up when I'm frustrated but mostly I noticed I get really angry when I feel mistreated or when im not understood and especially in relationships
      • Ginny MODERATOR

        -1 +1

        May 4 2012, 21:26
        Well, of course you get angry when you feel mistreated or when you're not understood in relationships. That is normal. You call that an anger problem? What else you got? When I saw the words "anger problem" I thought you threw chairs around, punched you bf, kicked the dog...
        Ginny
        • Ginny MODERATOR

          -1 +1

          May 4 2012, 21:39
          P.S. I'm sorry, that might have come across kind of too flippant, and i did not mean it that way at all. What I meant was, when you say "anger issues," I have a suspicion that that is not necessarily what's wrong with you. I suspect it might be more like, you have issues you are angry about. Totally different thing. What are the issues? What is it that hurt you that you need to heal from, please?
          Ginny
          • lanie Newbie

            -1 +1

            May 5 2012, 00:22
            Well if I get really angry and something doesn't go my way depending on how my bf treats me I will go off the deep end and hit him..but keep in mind for me to get that angry u really have to disrespect me..
  • May 5 2012, 03:44
    when u feel like you getting angry take a walk and if you cant leave just write what mad you mad down and it works thats what works for me
  • Ginny MODERATOR

    -1 +1

    May 5 2012, 11:49
    Oh, I like Tina Marie's advice.
    The problem with hitting men is that at some point they'll get tired of it and call the police on you, press charges, and it's possibly you'll then have a record, which damages your employability. With a domestic violence record, it's possible you could have problems with a number of jobs: healthcare even at entry level, child care, even waitressing could be hard to get hired for if they think you're a hothead. A lot of the time those records are easy for employers to find, too- many court records are even on the computer.
    But what does he do that is disrespectful?
    And how does he handle it when you hit him?
  • musicman Contributor

    -1 +1

    Aug 19 2012, 22:29
    The problem with hitting men is that it is not normal to hit anyone. That is an indication of an emotional problem (anger etc) that needs to be dealt with. I'm talking therapy and possibly medication.

    I have anger too. Today, I just don't have much interest in anything other than staying away from the people and situations that make me angry. I'm not very hopeful and I want to cry, but I'm not going to hit someone.

    Even, with my non-violent anger, I am going to have to try somehow to deal with this lest it fester and build up inside.

    That's why I'm on this board and that is why I have people I can talk with.

    Anger is not a sign of weakness and getting outside help is not weakness. Best wishes in getting some help.
    • Ginny MODERATOR

      -1 +1

      Aug 19 2012, 22:33
      I think using phrases like 'not normal' sounds very judgmental and not helpful.
    • marquis27 Newbie

      -1 +1

      Jan 4 2013, 15:11
      i also believe you have to be around positive people and or around people that make you happy. when you are around negativity your bound to get yourself into trouble. so your situation always matters. we have to look for change out of bad situations. because of anger issues between two people etc....you might be tryin to do better but if the other person isnt sometimes it takes you back to your old angry ways .so my way out of anger issues now ..is to change & remove unhealthy situations from your life including relationships friends, jobs ,family and more
  • Ginny MODERATOR

    -1 +1

    Aug 19 2012, 22:32
    I've heard they sometimes use depakote for anger, I don't know how well it works.