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Mar 9 2017, 10:05
  • Kay Newbie

    -1 +1

    After 13 years of marriage and being with the love of my life he wants to separate because I don't like giving bj's. It's not that I find them disgusting or anything I just get in my head and don't do them. I hate that I have hurt him it breaks my heart and I would love to change. I actually have tried the past 2 days and he just pushes me away. Not sure if my marriage is over or if we can fix this, I am trying but I don't feel like he is willing. I understand I hurt him and made him feel bad about himself and I have to live with that and try to make it better, but how do I do this if he pushes me away?
    He said some pretty hurtful things to me that have made me cry and broke my heart but I am willing to let that go and move on, I wish he could do the same. This is the only thing we fight about, even though I could get mad and fight about stuff he does, I choose not to. I put my feelings aside so that we don't fight. I hate that he chooses his friends over his family and likes to stay out all night drinking but I don't say anything and just let him do what he wants to do. I love him so much and don't want not to be with him, but I'm starting to think maybe he does not want to be with me. I just don't understand how me telling him I don't like bj's, he can't get past, when he told me I was a cunt, a stupid bitch, and a bad mom, if I'm willing to forgive him why can he not forgive me?
    Hopeless and I hate myself for not taking care of him and making him feel undesirable. I wish and willing to change if it's not too late. Please any suggestions