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Important: Forum Rules!

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Ask the Therapist
Feb 24 2010, 00:16
  • jack morrison ADMINISTRATOR

    -1 +1

    Please follow these rules:

    Etiquette

    1. Treat other group members with the dignity and respect you would like to have them show you.
    2. Share rather than teach. The group is not the forum to impress others with your strengths, rather explore your vulnerabilities and life challenges.
    3. Acknowledge the group as a social microcosm, fellow members present an opportunity to help you resolve difficulties you experience in the world.
    4. Use "I statements" in your sharing to ensure effective communication of your experience.
    5. Strive to be honest; we spend much of our life wrapped up in denial, repression and delusion.
    6. Don't abuse your power-knowing more than others about a particular subject or experience does not give you the right to dominate or intimidate.
    7. Take responsibility if you have caused hurt in the group by projecting your own feelings onto others. Validate other members' experience even if you do not fully understand the source of their hurt.
    8. When you experience resistance about acknowledging a behavior or challenge, explore the possibility that group members may be presenting you with a growth opportunity rather than a threat.
    9. Exercise control over your behavior, resist the temptation to act out in impulsive and destructive ways that have you feeling guilty afterwards. Filter your responses checking for unhealthy defensive behavior.
    10. Whilst it is natural to gravitate toward some members more than others resist the temptation to form cliques that gang up on other members. Remain mindful of your interactions and operate for the benefit of the group as a whole.
    11. Be forgiving of other members' mistakes. If you choose to comment on destructive behavior, do so constructively refraining from sarcasm and humiliation.
    12. Finally, if you cannot resolve a personal challenge in the group, consult directly with the therapist by email.
  • Support ADMINISTRATOR

    -1 +1

    Mar 3 2010, 15:42
    I like these rules.
    • Alicia Contributor

      -1 +1

      Mar 13 2011, 17:21
      I feel like an emotional black hole. I have a great deal of difficulty showing my emotions. I've been that way since I was raped by my biological mother's boyfriend at the age of seven. Now I'm married. The man I'm with used to drink and subsequently abuse me in a variety of ways, hit me, slap me, choke me, hold a knife to my throat. He's even held a gun to my head and almost killed me by choking me out. He no longer drinks or abuses me and is trying to be very patient with me but is becoming increasingly impatient with my apparent lack of progress. I get mad over little things. I get irritable very easily and am prone to angry emotional outbursts. When I'm not doing that I don't feel anything, like I'm numb. There are so many areas to chose from so I can't say that it's one thing or another that has brought me here. I push him away even though he tries very hard to keep us together. I can't understand why I can't just let the past go. I've tried to talk to him about it but it hurts him a great deal to hear about his past mistakes and he becomes angry with me saying that I'm trying to make him feel guilty and why can't I just let the past go? I don't know why I can't. I need help.
  • Samantha Newbie

    -1 +1

    May 30 2011, 19:05
    Hi Alicia,

    I too feel a lot of these same things. In my cases I had extreme emotional triggers. I know when I experience a feeling what is likely to follow. I have a very hard time separating that feeling from my interaction in that moment. Feeling A comes from anywhere and experience B gets the reaction of Feeling A. The challenge comes with experience B, when it doesn't pertain to A at all. I strongly believe one must be whole to bring good to a union of any sort, husband wife, parent child and so on. I am not whole at the moment, you may feel the same. This is why I too struggle with my next step.
  • naioom Newbie

    -1 +1

    Sep 13 2011, 06:05
    I'm suffer from shame and fear,with shame and fear of everything such as participation, all alike near me or strange about me,I dont like crowded places because I have a felt tension, confusion, and the feeling associated with fear sensation increased heart palpitations, And trembling hands, especially when there is one over my head,i feel strees when i speak and reddens my face, and I can not see the eyes of others when you talk to them for a long time with my feelings that this thing, few in the literature but I do not appreciate that I do something about it.I feel that I am cowardly and I Failed with time, all I want to return my soul means that he get rid of as soon as possible so I feel comfortable, sometimes I feel parasite when I go to join the modern people and sometimes I feel that others Pity on when seeing me alone.Now I suffer from being in college (mixed) One way or another, sometimes I can take it and sometimes do not appreciate it, I feel like I was crazy for talking to the many myself.
    How is it possible to get rid of it? Any suggestion??!!

  • Support ADMINISTRATOR

    -1 +1

    Apr 23 2012, 00:31
    hey friends! please do not post on the forum rules thread. i will close this now. please feel free to comment anywhere else or contact a therapist! have a blessed day - you are a wonderful person inside, don't ever forget that!

This thread has been closed.