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Need some guidance I suppose

Addiction

Mar 7 2012, 20:11
  • tweezy Newbie

    -1 +1

    Hi, I've come here tonight to find out why I think the way I think. For a while now I've grown bored of my life, I'm only 18 and I know there is a lot to see and do, and one might say the future does excite me, but yet I'm here thinking what Death is like...

    I put myself in dangerous situations daily just to spice my life up a little, just to try and gain a little excitement. Just today I was nearly taken of my motorbike, well twice this week.

    I try and find things to do which aren't dangerous, like reading and writing, well it doesn't last long. I've been watching people base jumping on Youtube, just watching them tempt Death gets me on the edge of my seat... I've been bungee jumping but it was so short lived. I've had the thoughts that base jumping could be bring my life to a premature end, but this doesn't scare me at all, instead interests me.

    I've asked myself numerous times what I want from life and you know what, I couldn't care less as it will all fade away anyway eventually, though I suppose if I live in the now I would like a family of my own.

    I don't think I'm depressed as I can find myself enjoying life without being in a dangerous situation. You might be thinking why I've picked my category as addiction, maybe I'm addicted to Danger?

    Thanks
  • Jul 29 2012, 02:12
    Hey Tweezy,
    I'd just like to say I am 18 as well, and understand what you're saying. I know a lot of people who (especially around our age) find that sort of danger and excitement..thrilling. Like it's giving you something to live for. Just know that I have watched videos on youtube of base jumping and sky diving myself, and there is an insane difference between loving it for the moment and having that passion for it versus using it as an excuse to throw your life away..

    here to talk.
  • SWIM Contributor

    -1 +1

    Jan 26 2013, 13:07
    I'm 21 and I can only speak for myself when I say I wake up everyday wondering what's around the corner think about it. Your first concert how awesome was that? Or how about the first time u see your nieces face or your first threesome with two of the sexiest girls u have been with. And your only 18! I'm 21 and I'm not even a quarter of the way done....I grew up skating,snowboarding,biking,climbing,whitewater rafting, and other extreme sports and honestly I can't wait to see what they will come up with next I wanna try extreme pogo.....just find work or school and stay busy busy then u won't have time to ask these questions and u will be able to travel the world
  • tweezy Newbie

    -1 +1

    Jan 26 2013, 14:33
    Hi, thanks for all the replies. I have the most amazing person in my life right now but the excitement of danger still, well excites me. I don't put myself in dangerous situations anymore as I think it is a little bit selfish as I now have another persons feelings I have to think about.

    Still, finding this post and realising not a lot has changed does confuse me a little. I guess that is life ay?
    • SWIM Contributor

      -1 +1

      Jan 26 2013, 14:49
      I'm reading a very good article on OCD and something in the article jumped out at me I think this quote will help. "There are no answers, but only choices." I think this quote speaks volumes. I have OCD and sometimes the anxiety is unbearable. I still do not seek to be prescribed anxiety medication, and would rather cope with life on my own. I think it is good to take risks, however dangerous they are, but YOU have to draw the line somewhere. For example, I might say to myself, 'this bridge is really high up….I bet it would be awesome to base jump off of as long as I take the right safety measures.' as opposed to this thought which is where I would draw the line, 'Wow, that fire looks like it is really hot….I wonder what it would feel like to jump on it.' As I grow older I find more and more interesting things, yet I have no real answers to explain why these things are the way they are. The choices I make, though, seem to constantly change hopefully in a helpful direction. 10 years ago I would have gladly jumped into a hot fire pit just for the sake of doing it. As I grow older my impulses become refined, more intelligent, more reasonable, and the less my choices lead me down a dark or unwanted road. I realize that I don't have to do everything or say everything that comes to mind. Instead I contemplate and premeditate my every move, and everyday these choices become more refined and in my mind more sane and less harmful. In other words I look before I leap so that when I get to the other side I don't come out looking like a jackass. This way I can shape the type of person I want to be perceived as. Hope that helps!
  • benjamin Newbie

    -1 +1

    Apr 15 2013, 07:14
    i am Benjamin, i'm addicted to watching porn and same time wanking myself. i feel i'm a loser because i cudnt get a real girl to fuck! i wanna stop watch porn, i've tried to but it has not been easy for me.. how can i stop? pls.

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